CENTER CITY, Hell (Enviro Snowflake Brief). News came out of Hell last night that plans are underway by deceased tobacco industry leaders to host a future luncheon for today’s Monsanto agriculture chemical executives.

The spokesman for the planning committee in Hell, Helmut Wakeham, the deceased Head of Research and Development of Philip Morris, reminisced about one of his infamous internal memo quotes from 1970.

“We are interested in evidence which we believe denies the allegations that cigarette smoking causes disease,” Wakeham had written when alive.

Helmut continued, “you can see why we just love these ag chemical boys.”

Monsanto headquarters did not respond to the media on the news out of Hell, but executives are preoccupied with the first trial over whether Monsanto’s Roundup herbicide caused a user to get cancer.

We reached Monsanto’s lead defense attorney in San Francisco, George Lombardi, who told us “just because Monsanto has ‘ghost’ written research reviews, unduly influenced regulators and created front groups to falsely claim glyphosate is safe, it shouldn’t guarantee my boys will be at that luncheon.”

A deceased 1970’s tobacco attorney replied to the statement released by Mr. Lombardi.

“Bon Appetite, drinks will not be served, but their attorneys are welcome.”