Jefferson County, WISCONSIN (Enviro Snowflake Brief)— Judge Bennett Brantmeier was honored by hound hunters at a Jefferson County private “bear stew cookout” for his surprising ruling requiring Wisconsin DNR to immediately hold a gray wolf hunt, in which at least 216 wolves, in sixty hours, were mostly chased by hounds and snowmobiles, and many impaired with a gut shot in order to allow hounds to finish off the tortured animal.
“Magical and just blessed to be responsible for making so many houndsmen happy to bag a pregnant female wolf (hunt in middle of breeding season). I’m sure God smiled at these Christians and patriots having a good time.”
The “bear stew cookout” event was sponsored by several anonymous white nationalist groups as a recruitment event, and also by the GED Challenge Institute reminding hounders, “you can get past third grade in between bear and wolf seasons in 2021.”
The event was well attended by top DNR officials, who created the “blown out” quotas (216 killed vs 119 quota) and liberal hunting rules (none), as well as attended by Republican state legislators, who made Wisconsin the only state in the country requiring a yearly wolf-hunting season.
There were many large families of hound hunters, including husbands and wives, brothers and sisters, and moreover, many attending told us with a naughty smile, “that’s my wife and my sister.”
Judge Brantmeier thanked a very inebriated warm audience telling them, “I am excited to get home to my TV lounger, a bag of pork skins, and spend the rest of the weekend watching the “wolf snuff” videos so many of you hounders generously sent me.”
Closing out the event, as the wintry sun in the brightness of the February afternoon shined down on the cold hearts attending, the hounders surprised the Judge with a live action exhibit- a penned and impaired wolf (gut shot).
The hound hunting crowd yahooed and encouraged Judge Branmeier to let the six hounds in the gate, which he did with a smile, and the celebration continued a little longer.
Judge Brantmeier won his last election “unopposed,” and is up for re-election in 2023. He has the hound hunter vote for eternity.
(ESB-NOT REAL NEWS)
Writer’s Note: “In Shirley Jackson’s classic short story “The Lottery,” the villagers of a small town randomly choose one of their own to stone to death for no ostensible purpose other than the cathartic thrill of the kill.” (Chicago Sun-Times)
